Christine Chiu hadn’t planned on disclosing her fertility journey to the world. But that’s exactly what happened on Season 1 of Bling Empire when Chiu surprised everyone by revealing that she and her husband, Dr. Gabriel Chiu, had undergone multiple IVF treatments during a confessional interview.
“It was a complete accident,” she tells Tudum from her Beverly Hills home. Initially, Chiu wanted to have the confession cut from the show, but, in retrospect, she’s glad she decided to talk about it.
“I had held it in for so long and that wasn’t great for my mental health,” Chiu reflects. “There’s so much power in sharing our journeys and being there to support each other and talking it through. That was something I didn’t have when I was going through it. There were less than a handful of people with whom I could disclose difficulties, and it became a very lonely — unnecessarily lonely — journey.”
Chiu is part of a growing number of celebrities, like Chrissy Teigen and Kourtney Kardashian, using their platforms to share their fertility journeys to offer hope and encouragement to others experiencing similar things. Fellow Netflix stars Chrishell Stause and Heather Rae El Moussa of Selling Sunset have been similarly open about their decision to freeze their eggs.
Marissa Nelson, LMFT, a Washington, DC-based licensed marriage and family therapist, who specializes in couples and infertility, thinks all the discussion around fertility and related treatments is a “wonderful thing.”
“When it comes to healthcare in general, seeing a topic on TV can sometimes spark curiosity about your own health,” shares Nelson. “It can plant a seed. People see someone they trust talk about a diagnosis and they’re more likely to think, ‘Hmm, I’m having similar symptoms, let me go get checked out.’ When you have awareness, you plant seeds. And when you plant seeds, that turns into action.”
Christine Chiu with her husband Dr. Gabriel Chiu.
Regina Townsend, founder of infertility blog The Broken Brown Egg, agrees. “Some shows and movies, such as Season 3 of Master of None, discuss the very real financial and emotional costs associated with infertility. The way they chose not to shy away from the heartbreaks and strains associated with infertility did a great job of opening up meaningful conversations with viewers,” Townsend says. “They help to give a tangible example of what so many are going through. And yet we still have a long way to go.”
In order to arrive at a place where fertility issues are accurately portrayed, though, there is a dire need for representation that encompasses a diversity of experiences. “Black women are more likely to experience infertility compared to white women,” Nelson points out. “We also have a higher rate of fibroids, PCOS and endometriosis. But the face of infertility is overwhelmingly white. Often when we’re talking about fertility or fertility care, we’re leaving people of color and women of color out of the conversation.”
This is part of the reason Chiu wanted to speak out about her experience. “The greatest silver lining of participating in this reality show is being able to share this story,” says Chiu. “It was a relief and kind of a burden lifted off of my shoulders. This is now no longer just about me and our family. This is about the millions of people undergoing similar struggles.”
When Chiu married her husband in 2006, there was pressure from their families to “reproduce right away,” she says. Chiu grew up as an only child, and the idea of having multiple kids and a big family was exciting to her. But the excitement of trying to conceive wore off after about a year. “Initially, we did everything, all of the Eastern remedies. I did a lot of Chinese herbs. We both went to see Chinese medicine doctors. One of my Persian friends said, ‘You need to eat these kinds of dates at this time facing this direction.’ I drank this speciality tea. I did every weird thing, every weird combination — even sexual positions.”
Chiu felt like she was disappointing her in-laws, and the couple sought medical help. “There was never really even a question of whether it could maybe be male infertility,” she says of the focus on her health. “It was just, let’s get Christine checked out because there must be a problem with her body.”
It took six in vitro fertilization (IVF) cycles before the couple learned that male factor infertility was at play. According to the National Center for Biotechnology Information, roughly 50% of infertility cases are due to male factor infertility, which can be caused by abnormal or low sperm production, or blockage of delivery of sperm.
“We finally went to a fertility clinic in San Francisco, and [the specialist] really studied the medication, the pattern, the cycles, the research and everything, and she said it’s not female infertility here, it’s male infertility,” recalls Chiu. “And I don’t know if it was a coincidence, but it was a female Asian fertility doctor. I think she had a different level of interest and passion in my particular case. She really took a new perspective and she was determined.”
Afterward, Dr. Chiu underwent several procedures to get to a point where the couple could have viable sperm. The seventh IVF cycle, which brought them Baby G, was the “magic one,” says Chiu. While the couple initially only planned on having one child, their fertility journey might not be over yet. In Season 2 of Bling Empire, the Chius go back to the fertility clinic to explore their options for having another baby, including surrogacy. “After losing my mom, it dawned on me that life is hard,” Chiu explains in Episode 7. “And I would not want Baby G to go through anything traumatic alone.”
Chiu during a photo session with Baby G in the first season of Bling Empire.
While there are many paths to parenthood, fertility treatments, surrogacy and adoption are among the more complex, expensive options to pursue, which is why seeing how these processes unfold in real time can be helpful to others considering them.
“I think presenting a balanced and realistic view of family-building is extremely important for us to change the hurtful conversations and stereotypes many of us face but also to help educate our friends and family members about how common this is, how to better support one another and, most important, the idea that communities of color are affected by this at all,” says Townsend.
Nelson also longs to see a more inclusive world when it comes to fertility, one that includes a multitude of races, genders and fertility treatments, including surrogacy and third-party gamete donation, wherein people use donor egg, sperm or embryos.
“No matter how you chose parenthood, you are still a parent,” says Nelson. “And it does not take anything away from you.”
Chiu also encourages people to open up about their journeys in an effort to help others. “Have more discussions with people who care,” she suggests. “When you bottle it up, you don’t do yourself or anyone any favors. People want to help. I think people are inherently good and they want to offer resources. When I started discussing more openly what we were going through, that’s when we were able to find a doctor who could help us. It’s a mixture of medicine and miracles.”
